Veteran's Day: I don't know who I'm thanking.

Veteran’s Day: I don’t know who I’m thanking, my brother, Junior or my brother, Charles.

Once upon a time, I signed up for the U.S. Air Force but because of a few technicalities, I left their office without signing on the dotted line. In the after math, I’ve learned that the  U.S. military is not for the faint-hearted because one must be willing to make the ultimate sacrifice.

We take our military for granted—coming to the rescue and keeping the peace in times of riots and political unrest, conducting search and rescue missions after natural disasters and acts of terror, bringing order to chaos no matter the circumstances, and fighting wars. We expect our military to weather the storms, and when the time comes, we graciously and shamelessly accept their ultimate sacrifice.

Our military families cannot be repaid—not with the G.I. Bill, veteran’s benefits or our individual thanks as we pass them by on our city streets. The best we can do is support them on Veteran’s Day because so many of our military personnel did not survive and although most remain alive, far too many also remain homeless, emotionally impaired, or unemployed.  On Monday, November 12, 2012, we observe Veteran’s Day. This is something veterans appreciate and something we can easily do.

For veterans, despite free meals on each birthday offered at many restaurants, Veterans Day is special. To make the simplest gestures of appreciation, participating restaurants make sure that veterans and their family members eat free: Golden Corral, Olive Garden, Applebees, Texas Roadhouse, On the Border, Famous Dave’s, and Red Robin restaurants. Veterans can also "google" to find other places that salute them and their families with a free meal. Veterans need to show the appropriate I.D.’s, so it’s important to call and ask what documents to bring. Besides this official National holiday in recognition of our military women and men, we can walk up to a uniformed soldier and say, “Thank you, for your service” or "Thank you, for serving our country."

On a personal note, my brother was killed while in the military and our family accepts there will be a permanent hole in our family tree. If I had known I’d have him for only 21 short years, I know I would have been more patient and more forgiving of his antics, and when he visited my apartment that night before he left for the very last time and was asked to leave because he was “past curfew,” I would have told my landlady to go straight to “you know where.” But “regret” is just a five-letter word, nothing more.

What I learned from my brother is that time is not always on our side, so we need to seize each precious moment and live it fully. If we love someone, we need to let them know, and if we need to forgive, we must do it now. As my mother, Ms. Essie always used to say, “Tomorrow is not promised.” So many families of veterans understand the magnitude of this short statement, but do we “civilians” really get it? I think we need to “get it” and learn to appreciate the little things in life, especially our veterans.

On Veteran’s Day, 2012, we can celebrate and salute our veterans. Our veterans cannot be thanked enough but we can try.  I wish all of our veterans a Happy Veteran’s Day, and that includes my brother Charles who lives to talk about his life in the military.  My brother, Junior, did not but his memory will never fade. I have fond memories of Junior, but I cannot wait to tell my brother Charles, “Thank you, for serving our country.” Happy Veteran’s Day to all who serve our country!