Writing is Therapeutic--Just Do It!

After my traumatic experience, I suffered anxiety, hyper-activity, over-responsiveness, overeaction, depression, and confusion about how I felt. Like many who develop PTSD and depression I became detached from my emotions, and this makes it even harder to discover that something in our emotional system has gone terribly wrong.

When I felt depressed, the only things I felt like doing were writing/typing and planning vacations. Vacations gave me something to look forward to, whether I took them or not--and I was usually too exhausted to travel anywhere. But I was always able to write. I have always known that writing is therapeutic because it allows us to express emotions that we might not know we had. Writing is one of the best things I might have done to reconnect with myself while suffering an emotional disorder.

Recognizing invisible emotional disorders is of great concern because without knowing the symptoms, treatment is impossible. Another great concern is fear of stigma, which keeps sufferers from getting treatment.Ten years ago, PTSD and depression were words that created feelings of guilt, insecurity, and shame because they were associated with some type of stigma, but this is no longer the case. Nearly every week, we hear of tragic events that happened because someone was suffering depression or PTSD. We now hear stories told by celebrities who overcame their emotional disorders.

PTSD and depression are not anyone's fault but they are everyone's responsibility. To eliminate these invisible illnesses we all need to know the symptoms. Just as it takes a combination of factors working together to create conditions for the perfect emotional disorder, it takes a community of people to recognize such illnesses and offer help. The combination of factors that can lead to PTSD or depression include: a tragic event, sustained or overwhelming stress or abuse, especially in childhood, and genetics. Factors can be biological, environmental or psychosocial, but no one factor is responsible for the onset of an emotional disorder.

It's not important to know the exact factors that caused the emotional disorder. What's important is knowing the symptoms and recognizing how these disorders work. Untreated, they leave sufferers at risk of suicide. Knowing the symptoms of PTSD and depression is the first step in treatment, but before we can help others, we must be aware of our own emotions and negative thoughts, and we must learn to help ourselves.

Writing is fundamental and writing is therapeutic. Emotions need to be expressed, and writing allows us to do that. If I wasn't a writer, I don't know if my PTSD would have been discovered because there was no one who knew the questions to ask, not even myself. Start writing about your feelings, learn about emotional disorders, and become proactive in managing your life so that you're able to help someone else.

BitterSweet

My mother, Ms. Essie, said, "You have to take the bitter with the sweet." She was right, but what she says is not easy. I watch junk on TV--and then, not so much. But I make it a point to watch National Geographic, mainly because I think animals have something to teach. I'm a groaner, given half a chance, but animals don't do such pitiful things. They wake up in the morning or at night, whenever, with specific goals--to find food for their young, to find a mate, or to move along to better hunting grounds. They understand what must be done and they do it without complaint. We all have so much to learn from such majestic creatures. This song, "BitterSweet" by BigHeadTodd&TheMonsters is dedicated to everyone who ever thought life should be this/not that because it's both, and it's up to us to find value in our experiences--all of them.

When my mother said, "It takes the bitter and the sweet to make a life complete," she meant that all days won't be good days, but it takes the bad days for us to appreciate the good little things in life. I try to remind myself that life is bittersweet, and it's an acquired taste, especially since everything we hear or read is about being positive 24/7--forgetaboutit!!! Who can be positive 24/7? Who wants to? I like knowing that life is bittersweet, a bit of sweet honey & a bit of sour grapes. Knowing that life is meant to be a bit of both positives and negatives allows me to experience the experience of being in my skin and in the spot I'm in day to day. Ms. Essie, my momma experienced the bittersweet, and she ended up having a very fulfilling life. Check her out if you want at http://www.survivingaday.com.

Be yourself, not someone in a video.

Be Yourself, not someone in a video

Nowadays, everyone wants to be a superstar on U-tube or anywhere else. Sometimes, we become so self-absorbed in what they do and we don't have, we start over-thinking, and forget to give thanks for the little things--a pretty smile, nice set of lips, beautiful legs, nice, thick hair--the list can go on and on, and we haven't even mentioned the small seemingly insignificant skills you might possess. Add them up, list them if need be, and say a little pray of thanks for one, then another as your list grows.

There's something therapeutic about having an attitude of gratitude, no matter what others might say or no matter how insignificant these little things might seem. You are your reality and only you can make your dreams come true. It all begins with being thankful for the little things. When it comes to discovering your assets, others can only try to help or they can try to hurt, but it matters not what they do because it's all about you. Stop reading their minds and find something to be thankful for, one day, this day. Start at your source, not mine or theirs, and wherever you are, let your light shine, no matter how impossible this might seem, no matter how faint your hopes and dreams. Practice makes perfect.

The more you practice gratitude, the more grateful, graceful and self-assured you become. Not only that, you'll find your voice and build your energy source. Seems impossible at first, practicing gratitude, becoming a source of energy, but you know the rule: One day at a time.
(c) M.D. Johnson (2012)

Easter

Like many holidays, Easter is a tough time for some people who have no one to spend the day with. Our society used to be a place where neighbors invited you over for barbecue or saved you a dinner plate if you had little or no family, but that was so long ago it almost seems like a fairy tale. I remember when it happened, but it's a foggy memory.

I don't celebrate most holidays for different reasons, but this year, I somehow found myself caught up in the razmatazz of it all--shopping, eating, drinking, etc. By the time I realized how much I had eaten, I fell into a state of remorse, and all of the negative self-talk began to kick in--"You're already overweight," (I'm not.) By now, I know how to recognize negative self-talk and usually,I don't open the front door to let it in. Today was different.

Remember the horror movies? There are rules when it comes to haunted houses. If you hear a knock at the door, don't open the door to let the evil spirits enter in. The same goes for negative thoughts. When they come knocking at your door--"knock-knock/who's there?" Drop & STOP them right at the door. That's what I did yesterday, once I realized what was going on. But before I stopped myself, here's the scenario:

I had talked to my daughter who was supposed to come and visit but the whole thing started turning into a circus & the plan was turned upside down. I became stressed & then saddened, so I started eating Ritz crackers, cookies, chocolate creme pie, and other unnecessary carbs before noon. Then I took myself to lunch, dinner, and drinks. I even did some mall shopping just before the stores closed. Afterwards, I headed to the all-night grocery store for some brie cheese, crackers, and a nice bottle of wine. Once I got home, I was too exhausted to put anything away. There it all sat--boxes of shoes and a few other items. Then there were the dishes to be placed in the dish washer. I looked at the mess, and linked it to the mess that I felt I was. My stomach seemed to have doubled in size, and I suffered indigestion because of the strange mix of foods I had consumed.

I started feeling depressed thinking about the mess in the kitchen and and how I didn't have anyone to spend Easter with. Of course, I don't celebrate Easter, but still, the negative thoughts we telling me that I should, despite all else. That's suddenly realized I was ruminating over past behavior and I needed to move on. I looked myself in the mirror just to admire my smile, which didn't come so easily. Then I started building up the person I am. I told myself: "You don't do Easter, remember?" Finally, I created a mantra of sorts: "Those who do, do holidays. Those who don't, head to the beach!" And that's exactly what I did.

I drove 15 minutes to discover one of the most beautiful beaches that I've seen in the USA. I ordered Cole slaw, hush puppies, and fried oysters (love 'em) and found a table on what seemed the pier that stretched to the ends of the earth. After watching the seagulls compete for crumbs being tossed their way and watching sea birds create formations while flying overhead, I started to focus on the natural beauty of pristine waters, gentle winds and the warm sunlight. Afterwards, I felt inspired enough to explore another oceanfront town and discovered another beautiful beach. Just seeing the people walking--families, couples, and singles--sun-bathing, throwing Frisbees, fishing or sitting alone overlooking the beach made me feel right at home. T

I ended the day with a smile on my face, and I don't smile as much as I will some day. But today, I came home smiling about my adventurous spirit, my ability to explore on my own with our without a partner, and my appreciation for nature in her purest sense. With something so simple as a smile, I kicked negative thinking in the shins and shut the door! Next time, I won't bother to let the evil spirits in, because not everyone celebrates holidays or not everyone has someone to share it with. The secret is being okay with or without having someone to share the holiday with.

Do something for somebody quick!

Do something for somebody quick!

People suffering PTSD and depression tend to forget about others as they struggle with their own symptoms and problems in life, but the easiest way to feel better is to think of someone else, no matter how distressed you feel. You might want to donate, volunteer, or offer to wash a neighbor's car. You might see someone in distress and offer to help. You might even offer a community resource if you know that you won't cause offense.

As a child, whenever I felt sad, I went to the library, read a bit, and checked out a book of poems. My favorite was Best Loved Poems of the American People, published back in 1938 or so. The following poem is an excerpt. What follows the poem is food for thought. PTSD and depression can be tackled without medication, but not without reaching out to others...


#1 How to be happy
Are you almost disgusted with life, little man?
I'll tell you a wonderful trick
that will bring you contentment, if anything can
Do something for somebody, quick!

Are you awfully tired with play, little girl?
Wearied, discouraged, and sick-
I'll tell you the loveliest game in the world,
Do something for somebody quick!

Though it rains like the rain of the flood, little man
and the clouds are forbidding and thick,
You can make the sun shine in your soul, little man
Do something for somebody, quick!

Though the stars are like brass overhead, little girl,
and the walks like a well-heated brick
and our earthly affairs in a terrible whirl,
Do something for somebody, quick!

It only takes a minute to save or lose a life. You never know when you're staring in the face of someone who's just about given up. It takes participation from all of us to recognize and support someone in distress. Suicide prevention is no longer a personal matter, and emotional disorders that lead to suicide are no longer stigmatized and private affairs. "If you see something, say something." It might mean a lifetime of difference for someone.

And one more thing: Happiness always follows a good deed, if only for a moment, but that's how we live anyway--moment to moment one day at a time. - (c) M.D.Johnson (2012)

48 million taking Xanax

 48 million taking Xanax

Watching one of the morning shows, I was surprised to learn that 48 million Americans take Xanax to "take the edge off" of an otherwise stressful day. But Xanax is only one type of medication used for such purposes. With this in mind, is there any wonder we're so unresponsive or apathetic toward others who might need emotional support? Or is it any wonder we fail to see signs of emotional upheaval in friends and family?

We're living in hectic times. School bullying, harassment, or other causes of stress often go unnoticed by others. Many who know and love us don't have time to notice changes in our behavior or demeanor, especially if they're taking meds to manage their own levels of stress. We all must learn to handle stress in our lives, and meds are not the answer. They are prescribed for temporary relief from serious emotional trauma and designed to work with exercises to build emotional resilience.

The point here is, medication only lasts for a short while before the dosage must be increased. This makes medications like Xanax highly addictive. So if you're like the 48 million taking Xanax to reduce levels of stress, BUYER BEWARE. Taking a prescribed mediation can be helpful in the short term, but if you don't learn to manage your own levels of stress and anxiety and build your emotional skills, meds can be deadly. There are far better ways to build emotional competence.
(c) M.D. Johnson (2012)

Note to Self: Be aware of Yourself!

 Note to self: Be aware of Yourself!

Break the habit of reactivity—reacting to what others say, do, and perceive. Build yourself a formula for withstanding negativity and going into Default Mode, which is the "What-I-Stand-For/Who-I-Want-To-Be" Mode. It’s not what happens but how we react that makes the difference.

On the night of 9/ll, I was driving around, looking for a back way out of Queens and into Jersey City where my daughter lived. She worked on Manhattan's East Side, changed at the World Trade Center, and transferred to something headed uptown. I babysat her son at my apartment in Queens. That morning we had talked. She was heading to work and would drop by at about six to pick up her son (because she'd been sick, he'd been staying with me for a week). Absorbed in events of the day, I hadn't noticed the time. It was 8:30 pm and my daughter had not arrived, which is why I felt I needed to find her, prayed to find her in her New Jersey apartment. I was overjoyed when she opened the door explaining why she couldn't call, but I mourned those who didn't make it home.

I thought I was trauma-proof, but I guess not. Although no one thing causes PTSD, it often follows traumatic events. And for me, it did. With PTSD, I learned what it means to be confused and hyper-vigilant, and although I didn’t seek medication, medical intervention or get a proper diagnosis, I think I should have. Not knowing the symptoms of PTSD didn't help--shattered nerves, extreme anxiety, nervousness, fear and aggressiveness,(some have nightmares--I didn't).

I never dreamed that for some individuals, facing trauma can have devastating side-effects. An emotional disorder depends on a combination of factors interacting to create conditions for what might be called, a perfect storm. Many individuals need medical intervention after a traumatic event. So if disaster strikes or if it's been in your past, why not see a doctor, just to be on the safe side? You don't have to seek psychotherapy because self-help intervention that builds emotional strength will do, but a proper diagnosis by a licensed professional is important, and meds may be helpful.

Medication calms shattered nerves and allows the emotional system to heal. Also,medication can change the way you process information or react to negativity in the long run. It helps to keep your anxieties, fears, and stress levels in check. After a traumatic event (natural disasters, military combat, trauma in the line of duty for first responders, acts of suicide, bullying, harrassment or sexual abuse--we all shoud seek medical attention so that our emotional well-being is assured.

Getting treated for PTSD will also uncover or prevent the onset of depression. Despite what ignorance might say, there is no stigma for getting treatment for PTSD or depression. I wish I had known about these invisible or not so visible emotional disorders.

NOTE TO SELF: Be Aware of Yourself

How often do you participate in each of the following:
• Negative self-talk that undermines you
• Incessant negative thinking that has lasted for two weeks or more
• Self-sabotage (destroying yourself) including quick-fix behavior (drinking,drug abuse, violence, recklessness, arguments, etc.)
• Unrealistic thoughts based on unrealistic assessments of self and others.
• Over-thinking or ruminating over negative events
• Perfectionism that leads to feelings of worthlessness or incompetence.

If your emotions and feeling are out of sync, out of control, or confusing, you may be depressed. Only 8 percent of males and 20 percent of females will develop PTSD after a traumatic event, and only 40 percent of those who experience PTSD ever experience depression, but depression often co-occurs or it follows PTSD. It's important to be self-aware if you experience a traumatic event. Depression creeps in undetected, but it can have devastating effects.

Depression is characterized by incessantly negative thoughts--pumped out by the minute. It makes you feel tired, sad, or extremely insecure, and it robs you of the ability to find pleasure in life. Whereas PTSD can be more easily observed in external or outwardly reckless behavior, depression is invisible. Because of its invisibility and its ability to create hopelessness, depression can be deadly.

Building emotional resilience is the key to assuring emotional well-being. This is a forum for people. You are invited to join in and help build a network of support.
(c) M.D. Johnson (2012)