7 Aspects of Conversation at Holiday Parties

Are you invited to a holiday office party and fear your awkwardness will be revealed? Do you sometimes wonder what to say to colleagues, co-workers, and lesser-knowns at a festive gathering? Take comfort in knowing that you are not alone, but the more relaxed you are without being drunk or drugged, the less awkward you'll feel. Think positive, plan to enjoy yourself but always remember you are not alone. People watching is always an aspect of holiday gatherings, and when it comes to knowing how to behave, moderation is the key to success.

I don't remember where I borrowed the helpful hints, but I've listed them below.

7 Aspects of holiday conversation

1.Don’t drink before you arrive.

2. Wear something you feel comfortable in.

3. Walk in like you’re appreciated and expected.

4. Observe who’s doing what.

5. Get started by casually greeting a few people.

6. If you feel thirsty, get something to drink.

7. Mingle and start a conversation according to the following:

·        Mention something about the area or environment.

·        Introduce yourself and offer something about you.

·        Mention a trending topic.

·        If it’s not familiar to someone, think of another topic.

·        Pay attention to what’s happening in the room but   mostly listen and pay attention to the conversation.

·        Expand upon the topic of interest. Keep it short.

·        Before moving away, provide some forewarning by highlighting something that was said and by    establishing a future contact.

Parties are designed for celebration, and they're supposed to

be fun, but it's always a good idea to be on your best behavior

no matter how comfortable you feel. Respect everyone, not

just those who seem important. You never know who's 

listening and you never know whom you might be talking to. 

Other than that, eat, drink and be merry at your party, and 

always practice moderation.

Stuff happens. Don't let a setback devastate you.

When working to achieve goals, we are often told to expect the best but plan for the worst. That way, when we experience a setback, we are not devastated. But setbacks happen. According to the free online dictionary, a setback is "an unfortunate happening that hinders or impedes; something that is thwarting or frustrating." Setbacks can be hazardous to our health and unless we can quickly rebound from them, they have the ability to sabotage our progress and cause us to give up.

 

Setbacks create negative feelings and lead to negative self-assessments, and if negative thoughts or feelings of frustration are not acknowledged and managed, setbacks can diminish self-esteem and lead to feelings of hopelessness. When faced with a setback or when feeling extremely discouraged, the best thing to do is reconnect with the emotion that caused the setback. Find a quiet place where you can examine your feelings with no interruptions. Search for the specific emotion that caused the setback and name it--sadness, anger, embarrassment, etc. After the emotion is targeted and named, reenact the situation that caused it and allow yourself to experience the emotion fully, even if it leads to tears. If unable to discover the emotion, free-write about what happened and how the situation is affecting you. Write for three to five minutes without focusing on correct grammar, spelling, or writing skills. As you write, the emotion should be uncovered. 

 

After discovering and experiencing the emotion that caused your setback, find ways to replace it with a more positive emotion, keeping in mind the following:

• There is usually a lesson to be learned from a setback.

• A negative experience is seven times stronger than a positive one, so replace the negative emotion with three positive ones.

• List three of your most positive achievements.

• List three of your most valuable or desirable assets.

• Don't overdo it. If at first you don't succeed, try again tomorrow.

• Separate yourself from the setback because you are not your setback. 

• Remember, stuff happens

   

If all else fails, try connecting to a most positive moment in your life. Connect to a positive experience in the past and recall the way this positive moment made you feel. Stay connected to this positive feeling until you are able to move beyond the negative situation that caused the setback. Also, try being your own best friend. What might you say to your very best friend who was experiencing a major setback? If all else fails, find inspiration in great music!

Setbacks should be expected, but setback are hazardous to your health only if you allow it. There are many strategies that can be used to combat negative emotions related to a setback, but it's important to keep in mind, "To err, is human" and as the song goes, "that's life." http://youtu.be/90wUItXn62s

On Veteran's Day, the least I can do is smile and say, "Thank you, for serving our country."

Veteran's Day is today and many of us have lost veterans, but Veteran's Day is not a day to mourn. It's a day to celebrate those who served our country. On Veteran's Day, cities all over the world offer public ceremonies in honor of our veterans. Sitting through one of these events helps us appreciate the sacrifices our veterans made and continue to make for our country. If you wish to know more about Veteran's Day activities in your city, contact your local Chamber of Commerce or just do a quick search on the Internet. Your attendance is never required at one of these events, but if you attend once, you'll do it again and again.


I attended my first Veteran's Day ceremony just two years ago and still wonder why I didn't attend such an event much earlier. I have a brother who is a veteran, a nephew who is a veteran, my father was a veteran, most of my uncles were veterans, and I lost a brother in the military two months after his 21st birthday. He was a Vietnam veteran. As for me,  I signed up to serve in the Air Force, but when I was informed I needed to legally transfer custody of my two children, I walked out of the recruiter's office without signing on the dotted line. I often dream of the opportunity I lost, but I have volunteered for Americorps, the national corporation of community service, and I volunteer to assist with community events whenever possible.

If our veterans can give their lives for this country, suffer emotional and physical disabilities that last a lifetime, sacrifice family, and endure unimaginable hardships for the sake of this country and the world, the least I can do is honor them on this special day. If I can attend a Veteran's Day ceremony, I will, but the least I can do is smile and say, "Hello. Thank you for serving our country."

History of Veterans Day

World War I – known at the time as “The Great War” - officially ended when the Treaty of Versailles was signed on June 28, 1919, in the Palace of Versailles outside the town of Versailles, France. However, fighting ceased seven months earlier when an armistice, or temporary cessation of hostilities, between the Allied nations and Germany went into effect on the eleventh hour of the eleventh day of the eleventh month. For that reason, November 11, 1918, is generally regarded as the end of “the war to end all wars.”

Soldiers of the 353rd Infantry near a church at Stenay, Meuse in France, wait for the end of hostilities. This photo was taken at 10:58 a.m., on November 11, 1918, two minutes before the armistice ending World War I went into effect

In November 1919, President Wilson proclaimed November 11 as the first commemoration of Armistice Day with the following words: "To us in America, the reflections of Armistice Day will be filled with solemn pride in the heroism of those who died in the country’s service and with gratitude for the victory, both because of the thing from which it has freed us and because of the opportunity it has given America to show her sympathy with peace and justice in the councils of the nations…"

The information above was retrieved from http://www.va.gov. Consult the website to read the article in its entirety. http://www.va.gov/opa/vetsday/vetdayhistory.asp

7 Ways to Stop Negative Self-talk and Live Yourself a Life!

7 Ways to Stop Negative Self-talk and Live Yourself a Life!

Each day we are bombarded with information that creates fear and uncertainty. Each day, we face and overcome negative experiences that lead to negative self-talk which serves to diminish self-esteem and fuel emotional disorders like depression. Living day to day can be difficult when we seem to have so little control over what happens to us. But it is possible to protect our emotional system and stop negative self-talk that threatens our quality of life, even before it begins.

If we could live in the moment, paying attention to the little things, our lives would be happy and organized. With a few rules, daily practice, and a sense of forgiveness, we can achieve happiness and live a purposeful life. Seven practices for living a purposeful life include:

1. Fulfill basic needs.

We are born with basic needs that must be fulfilled, but we also have wants. Infomercials, advertisements, and commercials keep us wishing and working for more than we need. Keeping up with others is never easy, but this is something we can control. Decide what you need and fulfill those needs. The rest is unnecessary. Excessive lifestyles do not guarantee happiness, and in many instances, extravagant living destroys happiness. Establish a boundary between what you want and what you need.

2. Get organized.

Keeping everything in its place keeps your mind free to solve problems or to be more creative. Nothing spoils creativity or destroys peace of mind like unfinished business. Clutter reminds you of unfinished business. Take time to organize your belongings and schedule activities for the day.

3. Complete one thing at a time.

Make housework a form of meditation and breathe life into whatever you touch.  Schedule chores like you schedule your work day, and complete first things first, one step at a time. Each day, plan to complete only one chore but no more than two.

4. Live one day at a time.

Tomorrow is not promised, so live your best life today. Complete chores and daily activities with a sense of mindfulness, paying attention to details such as color, texture, sounds, smells, and taste. Walk through the world like you belong exactly where you are at any given moment in time, and know that you have a reason for being here on this day.

5. Smile and acknowledge others.

The shortest distance between two people is a smile, something which is meant to give away. Smiling at others causes them to spontaneously smile at you. Your smile can only be observed by others or by looking into a mirror, and who has a mirror to spare? Smiling serves a purpose that has nothing to do with you.

6. Take time to reflect and connect with your emotions. 

People who stifle their feelings get stuffed up. Sit, reflect on your experiences during the day, and express your emotions. All

experiences can become learning opportunities if you look hard enough. Write about experiences and how they made you feel. Stay in touch with your emotions through reflecting and writing.

 

7. Find gratitude and forgive your mistakes.

Find someone you can talk to during the day or at the end of each day, even if it’s your diary or writing journal. Express yourself, tap into your emotions, and find something to be grateful for at the end of each day.

You are human, so mistakes will happen, but at the end of each day, remember to forgive your mistakes. 
                                       - Emme H. Johnson