Part II--Millions of stories. This one is mine.

Had I known I was not alone, I might have stayed in New York City,  the place where it happened, talking it out among neighbors, co-workers and friends and relying on a community of support. I would have allowed my emotions to surface and be expressed. Temporarily moving out of state, I didn’t think anyone shared my reality, though people throughout the nation were mourning, too. Because my emotions remained unexpressed, my negative thoughts became incessant and my level of anxiety increased. Untreated PTSD can lead to depression. 

While not every sufferer of PTSD will develop depression, these two emotional illnesses tend to be linked, and many of the symptoms are similar. Only about 40 percent of those who suffer PTSD develop symptoms of depression, but when symptoms of depression begin to surface, less than 40 percent of those suffering symptoms of major depression ever seek help. Of those suffering milder forms of depression, less than 30 percent seek treatment. Depression is considered an invisible illness. Unless the symptoms of depression are known, this emotional disorder is nearly impossible to detect, and the longer it remains untreated, the greater the suicide risk.

After 9/ll, I began to experience anxiety and incessant negative thoughts. Each day, I awoke to stress, anxiety, sadness, and feelings of hopelessness.  Whenever the tragic event was mentioned, I cried. I remember one day I was window shopping in an upscale neighborhood in Great Neck, Long Island. I couldn't afford what the mannequins wore so I began to cry and abruptly left the store because I couldn't stop the crying. I was aware I was still grieving for the ones we lost on 9/ll and assumed my sporadic crying for months would disappear. But incessant crying or negative thinking is not normal. When negative thinking and sadness lasts for two weeks or more , some level of depression is usually the underlying cause.

After visiting a physician, I was prescribed mild medication for symptoms of stress, but my symptoms were more serious than that. I had been experiencing sadness and incessant negative thoughts for weeks when, approximately one year after 9/11, a coworker committed suicide, and instead of feeling overwhelmed, I found emotional strength—just enough to start writing about how to survive a tragedy. I grew up in a family of ten children raised by a single mother who taught us how to survive. I wrote on behalf of two friends—one who was recently incarcerated for killing her son and another who had killed himself. I began writing about survival—having the willpower to survive just one day at a time because if I knew anything at all since childhood, it was how to make a way out of no way and how to survive. 

I am still writing, and the recently completed book highlights what it takes to survive trauma and negative thoughts that follow emotional trauma. From research and personal experience, I can say that PTSD and depression are emotional disorders that can be effectively treated with or without a mental health professional and without medication but not without recognizing the symptoms, targeting negative thoughts, and expressing emotions through writing and "talk therapy." Whether through mental health professionals or self-help strategies, PTSD and depression require some type of intervention.Since some people will never see a mental health professional because they fear being stigmatized or fear the implications of being diagnosed as having an emotional illness, alternative forms of treatment using self-help solutions are important. 

Among medical or mental health professionals, there is no stigma in seeking treatment for an emotional disorder, but within social  or community circles, the emotional illness is still misunderstood. When it comes to seeking professional medical help, there are questions about privacy and whether medical records will cause sufferers of PTSD or depression to be portrayed unfavorably by insurance carriers and human resources departments. Because the majority of those who suffer depression do not seek treatment, self-help alternatives are important.There are many approaches to treating an emotional disorder, including self-help therapy, so fear of stigma is no longer an excuse for not finding alternative ways to treat emotional disorders.Knowing the symptoms is the first step to discovering and treating PTSD and depression.

The book I am writing is only for those who would otherwise disregard treatment and who are willing to do what it takes to conquer PTSD or depression on their own.This book is based on personal experience and case studies, research on depression and emotional disorders, and research on the latest  practices in the fields of brain research and self-help strategies.  It emphasizes best practices, education regarding symptoms,  hard work and persistence. Its purpose is to share information about PTSD and depression and to offer activities that promote positive thinking.

The book is not a substitute for treatment by a licensed mental health professional, nor is it intended to be. Its focus is on those who suffer minor forms of PTSD and depression. For more serious symptoms, an official diagnosis and treatment by a licensed mental health professional are recommended. The  purpose of this book is to provide information regarding invisible illnesses and to offer hope to sufferers who would otherwise fail to seek treatment. You will be notified when the book is completed so stay tuned.

Note:  If you have a brief story to share about PTSD or depression (anonymously or not), I am seeking a few contributions for inclusion in the book. If you are interested, please submit via this website or leave a message. The stories you provide will be used to raise public awareness. PTSD and depression affect people differently, and the stories you share will highlight different aspects of the symptoms. Proceeds from the book will be used to promote activities that raise public awareness of emotional disorders. Thank you for reading my story, and thank you for sharing yours.