Bragging Rights--Beating Depression Through Writing

Bragging rights 

I wrote a book on surviving PTSD because a friend/co-worker committed suicide and another friend killed her son first, then tried to kill herself. She survived, spent time incarcerated, and was released. If I know anything, I know how to survive, but I'm not perfect, like a thought I was, and I failed to realize I had fallen victim to an invisible assailant. Writing the book about how to survive, I discovered my own incessant negative thoughts but only after they had disappeared.

Negative thoughts are natural after traumatic events, but incessant negative thoughts and other symptoms that continue for at least two weeks signal depression, which often co-exists with PTSD or follows untreated PTSD. Because of my effort to share my formula for happiness, which began when I was a child, I ended up resolving my own issues with PTSD and depression, which had remained invisible for about two years. What a lovely surprise! One morning, I awoke early, expecting the usual negative thoughts. For a few moments, I sat waiting for the incessant negative thoughts to appear as they had consistently done over the years. After about twenty minutes, I began to hear the sounds of springtime from my open kitchen window. I finally realized, the negative thoughts had miraculously disappeared. Instead of incessant negative thoughts, I had awakened to the pure clean sound of absolutely nothing! 

Fortunately for me, I'm a writer, and writing is therapeutic. Writing allows us to express emotions that we did not know we ever had. If you want to know what you're feeling, the best place to start is with a pen and pad. Write for five minutes and see where it leads you. Follow exactly what your mind is saying, without changing words, without making corrections, and without worrying about spelling and grammar. (Your writing can always be destroyed when it's on paper). Simply write, and you'll catch yourself in the process of expressing emotions. After writing for about five minutes, reread what you wrote and see how you're feeling deep inside.

If most of your thoughts are negative, start monitoring the negative thoughts and see how many you're having during an hour. If they seem incessant, start writing them down and keeping track of how many times you think negative thoughts over a two-week period of time. Incessant negative thinking is one of the first signs of depression. By becoming aware of thoughts, feelings, and emotions, you can prevent or discover any invisible symptoms of depression or emotional distress. Self-awareness is the first step in building emotional strength and resolving issues of PTSD and/or depression.

Good job, Moore, OK, but why not build storm shelters for all school children.

Sometimes, surviving a day depends on the hard work of others. In Moore, OK and in the Oklahoma City metropolitan area, emergency workers are prepared for natural disasters like tornadoes. They are able to respond quickly and save many lives by getting the most appropriate care for those who injured. But could some cities and townships be more prepared?

When tragedy strikes, people are naturally confused and unprepared. Many people have refused to leave their homes despite ample warnings or they have nothing packed and ready to go, have no spare equipment, such as bicycle helmets or protective gear, or cannot locate necessary items to grab at a moment's notice. We all listen to warnings via radio and television but still, we linger, procrastinate, take chances, and fall victim to situations we might have avoided. It's human nature to doubt, but when there's a history of natural disasters, what kind of logic allows for doubt, procrastination or risk-taking? And how is it that the Moore, Oklahoma community allowed two older schools to remain in use without building storm shelters nearby?

Those familiar with Moore, OK know that this town is constantly hit by tornadoes, most of them not as powerful and therefore, not as publicized as F4 or F5 tornadoes might be, but the fact remains, Moore, OK is known for tornadoes. While the states of Texas, Oklahoma, Kansas and Nebraska comprise what is popularly known as "Tornado Alley," Moore, OK is considered to be Oklahoma's individual "tornado alley." Yet, despite its history, this suburb of Oklahoma City suffered many fatalities when hit by the most recent tornado. Things could have been much worse, but could they have been much better?

According to research by Impact Forecasting, "The costliest tornado in history occurred on May 3rd, 1999, when an F5 tornado devastated the Oklahoma City suburb of Moore." Damages totaled more than $1 billion. The following excerpt was retrieved from http://www.wildwildweather.com.

United States

Tornado History

Impact Forecasting

®

is a wholly owned subsidiary of Aon Corporation

1

The United States has the highest occurrence of tornadoes of any nation

in the world. During an average year, over 1,000 tornadoes occur across

the continental United States. Nearly a third of these tornadoes occur in

the states of Texas, Oklahoma, Kans

as, and Nebraska, an area known as

“Tornado Alley”. This is the area where conditions combine during the

springtime and early summer for the formation of supercell

thunderstorms and tornadoes. Over 55% of a year’s tornadoes occur

between the months of Ap

ril and June, when cool dry air from Canada

clashes with warm moist air from the Gulf of Mexico. These

ingredients, when combined with a storm system, generate strong to

severe thunderstorms and, in some cases, tornadoes.

This paper details historical st

atistics on tornadoes in the United States,

gives details and damage amounts when available on past major

tornadoes, and provides some tornado safety tips.

To stop negative patterns of thought, go to the source.

To stop negative patterns of thought, we’ve got to dig deep.

If we want to stop negative thoughts and negative self-talk, we’ve got to uncover and confront them. Facing negative thoughts can be difficult because we often prefer to avoid them, but negative thinking has a source, and if we want to find the source of our negativity or the unhappiness that results, we need to rediscover the “unexpressed” emotions that might be lurking underneath.

When we learn to identify our feelings and begin to name the exact emotions, the emotional system will respond. The emotional system never forgets, and if we persist, the source of our negative feelings will be revealed. Once uncovered, each negative emotion can be confronted, questioned and replaced with an alternative that is more positive. We can teach ourselves to accept positive thoughts instead of negative ones.

Learning to recognize emotions and express our feelings is the first step toward gaining control over how we think, react and feel. Psychologists insist, emotions must be expressed or they will haunt us later in life. Some even say, emotions will be expressed outwardly or they’ll be expressed within, affecting our physical and mental health.People who fail to express emotions get “stuck” or subconsciously preoccupied with a past situation that interferes with the ability to face real-life situations or solve problems in the present moment. Unexpressed or repressed emotions can lead to incessant negative thinking, which is linked to the onset of emotional disorders, like depression. 

Beating negative thinking requires that we find and name the correct emotion, connect to the emotion, and follow it until we reach a destination--the situation that first created the negative emotion in the first place. 

Our emotions will guide us. If we allow our emotional system to fully respond to a past negative situation by reflecting on the incident and forcing ourselves to revisit the negative emotion (no matter how painful or deeply hidden), we will be led to the actual underlying situation that became the source of our sad or negative feelings. Once we connect to an emotion, we can allow ourselves to feel what we might have avoided at an earlier time. Following an exact negative emotion requires persistence, but it is important to confront and question the validity of negative emotions every time they surface.

Negative emotions are fueled by situations or events, but the logic behind our emotions may not always reflect the truth. If a negative assessment sounds questionable, it probably does not reflect the truth. Once we are able to question and refute the validity of each negative thought--every time--we will stop negative self-talk, manage our thoughts and responses, and transform our lives.

"Feeling Cheated" Depression Stories - Ana II

            More than anything, I hated feeling cheated. I don’t know which came first, diabetes or depression but I have since learned they are interrelated. I remember feeling cheated and deceived--cheated because I had so much living to do and deceived because I had lived a positive lifestyle, made sensible food choices and chose responsible moral behavior (so I believed at the time) and now this! I asked, “Why me?” I rolled the words over my tongue—it didn’t flow. In fact, it felt almost like this label belonged to someone. I  internalized the diagnosis as a negative, rather than a positive. 

          I felt cursed but never thought to ask, “Why not me? Who else is a better candidate for diabetes? Who else can weather the stress? Clearly, I didn’t know myself. In life, I had weathered many storms, but I hadn't managed them. They had managed me. Stress was among those things I had mismanaged.  My life began with stress, continued with stress through middle school, high school and college. At home and on the job, I faced stress on a daily basis. With such high levels of stress since childhood and a family history of diabetes, I was a disaster looking for a place to happen. One traumatic event in 2001 changed my life forever.

             I  didn't like imperfection, and with the diagnosis of diabetes, I was saddened by how imperfect I was. In fact, I wondered how I could live a normal life ever again. I decided to sabotage my health—eating and drinking everything imaginable. That way, I could choose which way to die. Kidney failure was my choice because I knew and know to this day, I would never consent to dialysis. Sometimes, I asked myself, “Who would want to know someone with this dreadful, debilitating disease?” My diabetes was never well-controlled, probably because I had given up on living a normal life. With so much negativity around me—personal relationships,, workplace stress and harassment, and challenges of  single-parenting, I didn’t want to think about the future—everything looked bleak.

          Incessant negativity became my constant companion. Sometimes, I could hear a rational voice saying, “You’re so negative, you’re going to die of a heart attack or stroke,” but the negative thoughts poured in to reassure me that I was worthless, anyway, so why did it matter. Diabetes was the end of the world, or so I thought. But when the World Trade Center was attacked, diabetes was the least of my problems. I suffered post-traumatic-stress disorder (PTSD). Worse, I didn't know the symptoms and failed to get a proper diagnosis.

            I felt like a zombie, lost in a swirl of negative thoughts and sadness. Although I managed to see a doctor about my heightened levels of stress and anxiety, my concerns were dismissed. I was given a prescription and told to visit the doctor in six months. I did not. Eventually, negative thoughts poured into my head every second of the day.  I tried to put the thoughts into perspective, tried to make them go away, but they grew louder and more incessant. It seemed that the entire universe had fallen on my shoulders and I couldn’t see beyond the dark clouds. I could feel a water-logged horizon wrapped around my shoulders like a dripping wet shawl, weighing me down until I felt exhausted, but I couldn’t wish them away.

          I cried for months and sometimes entertained ways to die. Car accident? Gunshot to the head? Sleeping pills. I didn’t own a gun and didn’t plan to buy one. I didn’t have a stash of sleeping pills. I pondered the thought of dying and frequently asked myself, “What if I botched the job?” What if I became a burden on family, my body mangled and my mind filled with regret? Sometimes, the voice of reason can be found in the little things, like the voice of a child asking the question,“Mama, can you sign this permission slip?” I remember thinking that children are such saboteurs when it comes to interrupting negative thoughts. But I hadn't considered, they might also be saviors.

        Children: I’ll always appreciate their being here. Looking back, I can put things in perspective enough to analyze why children really are saviors. In spite of the“terrible two’s” and the “terrible teens,” children connect us to past, present, and future. They provide fond memories from the past to hold onto when the going gets rough or when we feel sadness. In the present, they prevent continuous self-absorption, which becomes a preference for those who become depressed. Children provide reasons to look toward the future, one day at a time as the progress through life. Looking at the faces of children, pets, or someone whose life depends on us, we realize that we are not alone and our actions have consequences. 

         Knowing that our choice will impact others, we usually find a way to survive. Children, pets, or ailing parents cause us to stop, look and listen, and in so doing, they stave off negative thoughts if only for a moment in time. Having will-power to stay alive for 24-hours is the first step toward changing negative patterns of thought that have derailed us. Sometimes, it's a struggle to live one more day, but taking life one moment at a time makes a difference.  Holding on to life begins with searching for the little things that create positive memories,  and reflecting on the happiness felt during those moments. Holding onto life also means focusing on family, close friends, or animals and asking, How will they be affected by my choice?

         Having responsibility for someone else can become the only reason for being here on planet earth.  Not everyone has a family to keep them centered, but some of us have pets. Those of us who do not have a pet can adopt one. Taking care of others forces us out of the pattern of negative thinking that can take over the brain. While responding to the self-centered demands of loved ones, it's difficult to entertain negative thoughts. With all of the talking, crying, complaining, or barking to get specific needs met, they force us to focus on them. Then we must make a choice: respond to their wants and needs or have our negative thinking process interrupted repeatedly. 

        Depressed people need help but don't know it. Not only does staying alive for 24 hours provide an opportunity to talk to someone about symptoms and feelings, it also provides an opportunity to make positive changes. Because depression requires some type of intervention, we cannot continue with "business as usual." We must make changes in our thoughts and behaviors, but this can only happen if we're around to make the phone call.  Being alive has many advantages, but the greatest advantage is, it's the first step toward making positive changes in our lives. 

          What if the life we've been living all of this time could be different?  What if there were ways to stop negative thoughts and feelings? What I learned from PTSD and depression is this: Life is beautiful and life is change, best lived one day at a time. Very few things are perfect and very few things signal the end of existence, so learning to go with the flow produces less stress. 

          Change is necessary and usually, it's a good thing. This I learned from depression. Now, when I think of the stress that has defined my life, I realize I needed a change. PTSD and depression forced me to make a change and for that, I feel fortunate. I find it hard to believe I have grown from incessant negative thoughts and feeling cheated in life to feeling grateful for untreated PTSD which led to the onset of depression and forced me to make changes in my life.

The only thing we have to fear is: Ourselves

When it comes to change, the only thing we have to fear is: ourselves.

1. Living with a sense of purpose helps to create happiness, but it can be a daunting task.

Creating happiness can be a daunting task. If we only had to think of ourselves, our families and our own lives, challenges in life would be easier, but we don’t live in a vacuum. We are connected, and whether we accept it or not, we are a village, complete with rules to follow regarding what it takes to be a good citizen, parent or mate.  But no one follows the rules, never did, really, and that’s a problem because we’re left to develop routines and set examples on our own. The very principles on which this country was built seem to be crumbling right before our eyes and no one seems to notice, or we’re just too busy to bother. It’s no wonder our lives are stressed.

Positive psychologists make it seem easy to achieve happiness. They suggest that we read positive books and keep positive people in our lives. They even suggest that we manufacture a “synthetic” happiness which makes no difference to the brain—happiness is happiness. But who can be happy all the time and in fact, who should be? Emotions must be expressed, even negative ones, and since we have no way of sharing negative emotions among family or friends, we eat, drink, and find ways to “quick-fix” our lives, ignoring the side effects.

Happiness begins with purposeful living and fulfilling a hierarchy of needs, so to sit and stew about what we’re unable to achieve is not the answer. We can’t eat or drink our way to happiness. Instead, we need action, commitment, and a willingness to change the way we think and behave. Changing requires that we step out of our “discomfort zone,” so when it comes to making a positive change, the only thing we have to fear is: ourselves.

2. To relieve stress caused by challenges we face day to day, we “quick-fix” and compromise our health.

Change is not easy, so we ignore our physical and emotional well-being and increase our risk of illness and death. We ignore symptoms and “quick-fix” problems through over-eating, drinking, acting-out or otherwise misbehaving. Eventually, we suffer major consequences—addiction, obesity, marital problems, and even incarceration or death. Research says that one-third of us are obese. Also, they say about 20 percent of us will face an emotional disorder or illness at some point in our lives. Yet, paying attention to our basic and emotional needs is the last thing on our minds.

Positive living is emphasized on a daily basis, so it’s not that we don’t know how to live a healthy life. We listen, but we don’t make a choice to change. If we ignore our minds and bodies, how can we hope to live the best life that we can? How can we set an example for the next generation? How can we expect to achieve happiness?

Change is difficult, but one step at a time, it is possible. First, we have to make the choice to change. Choosing to change is the first important step to purposeful living. When we make the choice on our own, we take “ownership” and in a sense, we become investors in our happiness and well-being. Once we make the choice to focus on our physical and emotional well-being, we set goals that help us live with a sense of purpose one day at a time.

3. In order to make a positive change, we need to expect resistance caused by enemies within.

Changing the way we live takes persistence. It also takes self-awareness. “To err is human.” Being aware of our humanity means being aware of our strengths and imperfections. It is important to know that humans don’t like too much change in their lives, no matter their level of discomfort, so when it comes to setting goals to achieve happiness and reinventing our lives, we can expect that the greatest obstacle to our success will be ourselves. When we feel discouraged or overwhelmed, we need to search for our enemies within and destroy them. Enemies that affect our progress toward living a happy, purposeful life include:

·        Denial. We don’t want to accept that stress can make us fat.  We feel overwhelmed, so we have a sugary treat. Then we eat again because we feel guilty about the negative choice we just made. As we gain inches and pounds, we buy bigger sizes in clothes, denying that we are gaining weight and feeling diminished when we don’t receive compliments like we used to.

·        Self-Sabotage. We consciously or unconsciously undermine our progress and destroy the hard work we have done.

·        Negative self-talk. Our brains are programmed toward negativity in order to keep us safe. This “negative bias” warns us of danger, but it can affect our happiness if not kept in check. It can also lead to depression. The brain can make mistakes, so with each negative assessment, we need to enforce a reassessment policy, refusing to blindly accept what our brain is telling us. We also need to confront each negative thought, question its validity and replace it with a positive thought. We can’t stop negative thinking, but we can make sure it doesn’t overwhelm us or affect our happiness.

·        Lack of trying. A given lifestyle might begin with circumstances, but it continues because of choices we make or fail to make. Sometimes it’s the toxic friends we keep in our circle or unhealthy foods that we choose to eat, but what we keep in our lives is a matter of choice.  For example, it’s hard to eliminate “friends” we have known for years. Likewise, it’s hard to find good nutritional foods in certain neighborhood stores. Everyone doesn’t live in privileged neighborhoods with equal access to goods and services. Some of us face issues of proximity—no healthy food choices, no good medical insurance, no doctors or hospitals nearby, no money to spend on health care. But even if it takes a bus ride across town three times a week, or car-pooling with a neighbor in exchange for help with yard work, or coordinating a community garden, healthy living can be achieved. Sometimes, it means changing friends or limiting access to toxic family members, but changing a lifestyle begins when we start trying.

Nothing worthwhile was ever achieved overnight. It takes time and commitment to change habits that might have existed since childhood, but living with a sense of purpose can be achieved one day at a time with positive actions and help from good, supportive friends. Yes, “It takes a village,” always did, and always will. But mostly it takes a willingness to change.

(c) M.D. Johnson (2013)

Pablo Neruda's poem is not yours.

In my humble opinion, Pablo Neruda excels when it comes to writing about love, but each poet has a different way of sharing what they know about love. April is National Poetry Month, a perfect month for expressing the emotion of love. Flowers begin to bloom, the sunlight lingers, stars seem brighter, and those April showers seem a bit gentler than they did a month before. Writing a poem seems harder than it is, but all it takes is an honest emotion and a quiet place to write. Feelings of love are not always similar, but when it comes to writing a love poem, honest expression of emotions is usually a good place to start.

It's not too late to write a poem about love and submit it somewhere. The poem could be something wonderful, or just a means of expression, but writing allows for the honest expression of emotions, and what stronger emotion to write about than love? In everyday affairs, we are not encouraged to write about our feelings, especially feelings of love. Instead, we are taught to hide our emotions, which can lead to misunderstandings, lost opportunities, and even emotional illnesses because sooner or later, emotions will come rising to the surface, and sooner or later they will be expressed in some way, somehow.

Why not use emotions to an advantage? Why not tap into emotions, positive or negative, and write a poem about love? With poetry, expression might begin as words on a page. As we continue to write, we make choices based on our desired overall effect, mood or tone. Eventually, we begin to write with a sense of purpose, challenging ourselves to choose words that best reflect what we wish to say and how we want it said.

Poetry is an exalted language not because of the words only but also because of the choices we make to use the "best words in the best order" for the specific situation. For example, the language used to write a letter of complaint will be quite different from the language used to write a love poem. Words used to write a satiric poem will also be different from those used to convey feelings of love. The magic of poetry is that it occupies the entire emotional system, which makes it therapeutic. It forces us to focus on a desirable outcome while our emotions are being expressed. 

Poetry is great for expressing emotions and creating a sense of purpose and anticipation, if only for the time that we write. April is a perfect time to express our love--or lack of love--and  practice using the best words in the best order to achieve a desired effect. The following poem seems a beautiful expression of love, but Pablo Neruda's poem is not yours.

  Sonnet XVII

I do not love you as if you were salt-rose, or topaz,
or the arrow of carnations the fire shoots off.
I love you as certain dark things are to be loved,
in secret, between the shadow and the soul.

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where.
I love you straightforwardly, without complexities or pride;
so I love you because I know no other way

than this: where I does not exist, nor you,
so close that your hand on my chest is my hand,
so close that your eyes close as I fall asleep.

Pablo Neruda

Short story: "Being a Girl Becomes Me"

Before it was renamed “Deep Deuce,” it was my home.  Row after row of small, white wood-frame bungalows, a sprinkling of three-story boarding houses, a corner grocery store, and a beer joint along with a sprinkling of small business located here and there. Sure, you had to search around but what ever you wanted could be found. We lived a few minutes from downtown where there was a Woolworth, a Veazey’s Drugstore, and an ice cream shop. Long after it was illegal, “separate but equal” existed. As long as this was understood, the drugstore was peaceful and quiet, just  the usual white faces staring as my mother refilled a prescription or ordered ice-cream cones for the five of us—to go.  We could order, but we couldn’t sit. A few years later, the drug store was sued because of it’s “separate but equal” business practices. By then, we didn’t want to sit. There were other places that were happy to see us.

Downtown was within walking distance, but to those in our neighborhood, it might have seemed miles away because all we knew and trusted were the streets that enclosed a one-block radius of people living, loving, and fighting day to day. My very first memory is sitting with my older brother and sister, the twins, as I liked to call them and feeling like a spider on the wall of a warm, but dimly-lit room where people were sleeping, whispering or arguing. I remember seeing my mother on her knees, her palms together in prayer every morning before the start of her day.

One morning, things were different. My father had left for work, my mother was on her knees and we three were playing quietly in one of the bedrooms, just the three of us. My baby brother at the time was asleep in his cage. Suddenly, out of nowhere, a shadow appeared and stood next to our bedroom door. I remember running and sliding underneath the bed hoping it was a good place hide. After a moment or two, I heard the floor boards creak as the shadow entered and then left the room where my mother was praying. Was it a miracle or was it the headlights from my father’s car that scared the shadow away? Our father had left his chef’s hat and apron, something every cook needed if he worked at the Pier 7.

I always thought I was two things--a boy and a mother, but much of my life I felt like a failure because I wasn’t much of either. “Boy’s don’t cry,” I always heard, and I liked to cry.  Mothers never cry in front of the children, I always heard. This I learned early on  and knew for certain, until I saw my mother cry for the very first time after she and our father divorced.

My first memory of crying was when I was three years old.  I was shamed into tears because my mother wanted me to wear a dress, but I wanted to wear red jeans and matching red jacket. I don’t remember if my bad behavior got me a spanking or not. All I remember is feeling overheated, shaky, sweaty and mad as a jersey bull—never saw one, but heard about them from my mama’s papa, as she liked to call her dad. My crying started innocent enough. I didn’t know what it meant to disobey. All I knew was, I didn’t want to wear that ugly, itchy dress.

 I recall sitting cross-legged in a corner of the room until my father came home. I remember my defiance and absolute resolve. As soon as I saw the flimsy, pink lacy-looking dress, I had started to itch. I decided then and there that I wasn’t wearing it, wasn’t going to my room, and wasn’t gonna stop crying—at least not until my father came home and saw evidence of her crime—trying to turn me into a Tinkerbell fairy or Snow White. When I heard the car pull up the driveway, but I didn’t budge.As soon as he opened the door and laid eyes on me, sobbing hysterically, my daddy opened his arms, gave me a gigantic hug and smiled. 

After he sat me on his knees, he sang me a favorite song. It was about the Big Bad Wolf. The whole time I was with my father that day, I didn’t see him take his eyes off me, not even long enough to offer my mother a smile. I just remember seeing his smiling face turned toward me, the gigantic hands reaching down to pull me to safety. My father sang nursery rhymes to all of his “kiddies,” but I knew I was his favorite because he sang the songs I liked best.

It was like that, my daddy leading the way and me following, stuffing freshly dug fishing worms in my jacket pocket or stepping into his boot prints just to see how big they were—at least, until the divorce and he moved away. I was ten years old. I remember standing on the corner with the others, watching his tail light blink to signal a left-hand turn. At the time I thought my father would return home late at night, just like he always did, just to sit the four of us kids on his lap, tell us a bedtime story, sing us a song and send us off to bed. It was impossible to sleep. I just wanted him to hurry home so he could pick me up and give me a hug like he always did when I felt afraid, and on that particular day, I felt very afraid. It wasn’t something you told anybody unless you wanted to feel like a girl.

I never considered how my mother must have felt—waiting in the bed for a husband whose arms were full of children. Never understood why she insisted that I wear dresses that always itched, always made ruffled sounds, had weird names like taffeta, gingham, and dotted swiss, and never failed to get ripped, causing me to get scolded or spanked. At thirteen, I was as tall as any boy but they didn’t treat me the same anymore, so I tried on a dress or two. I stopped climbing trees, started hanging around the house, and even learned how to cook because my father was a cook.

I finally forgave my mother for trying to turn me into something sweet and prickly because I decided she was trying to prepare me for days like this. Now, after all of these years, I have to admit she succeeded, and when I look at myself in the mirror, dabbing perfume behind my ears adorned with shiny gold earrings, I’m so glad she did. I'm not man enough to thank her, but being a girl becomes me.
(c) M.D. Johnson (2013)