Hospitality is a spiritual practice.

“Hospitality” is a spiritual practice. It requires giving of our time and attention based on what someone else needs rather than what we want. When we try our best to accommodate others, we communicate love. With acts of love and acceptance, we close the distance between ourselves and others. Sometimes, we either perceive ourselves as better than others or we feel we are not as good as others. We feel separated from others, but according to Buddhist practice, all of this “separation” is an illusion. We are not better than others nor are we less than others. We are different, but we are all human, and when we give to others, we strengthen our spiritual connection to others and to our higher power. When we realize our kinship with others, we also become empowered.

Hospitality requires that we share ourselves with others and accept whatever differences they might bring into our lives. Showing hospitality can be difficult when we perceive others to be “less than” ourselves, so hospitality requires humility, and mutual respect. Sometimes, when we help others, we perceive them as “needy” or inferior to us, but we are mistaken. We might feel uncomfortable, but those who make us uncomfortable enable us to grow. They force us to examine our beliefs, values, and prejudices, and as a result, we learn more about ourselves and what we need to change.True hospitality begins with acceptance but it involves embracing and responding to the needs of someone else. A simple act of kindness is a good place to start, but hospitality requires acceptance and giving based on mutual respect.

Depression doesn’t go away on its own. It needs intervention.

Depression doesn't go away on its own. It needs intervention.

          Have you recently heard something like, "What’s wrong with you? You seem different. You used to be so happy," and felt like crying because you didn't know what was wrong with you? Have you wanted to cry at nothing at all for no hormonal reason? When your emotional system is unbalanced, your level of happiness is affected. Negative thoughts and feelings become overwhelming and sadness dominates your life. Do you find it impossible to solve problems or to experience pleasure? Do you no longer find joy in things you used to love, like eating chocolate cake, playing games, intimacy, or watching television? Do you only feel overwhelming sadness? Do you feel anxious, worthless, and insecure but don't know why? If you're experiencing incessant negative thoughts and prolonged sadness, something has gone wrong. You are most likely experiencing symptoms of depression.

          With symptoms of depression, it's important to seek help. If you're feeling overwhelmed with negativity, hopelessness or have thoughts of suicide, the best place to start is with a phone call to 1-800-SUICIDE. They are trained to listen to you. Talking to someone will allow you to express emotions and explain how you feel, and if you need to know what resources are available, they can help.You are not alone. At least 20 percent of the adult population in the U.S. will experience an episode of depression in their lifetime. Right now, about ten percent of the population is feeling exactly like you do. Negative thinking happens to everyone, often on a daily basis, but negative thinking is not the same as incessant negative thinking. When negative thoughts are so profound or so frequent that they interrupt day to day living and problem-solving, something has gone terribly wrong, and whatever is wrong is not your fault.

            Depression is called an “invisible” illness because its symptoms are hidden or confused with symptoms of other illnesses. Like a thief in the night, depression steals and even kills, leaving victims and families devastated.  When one is depressed, finding positive outcomes or permanent solutions to problems is nearly impossible. If you feel like there is no way out, call 1-800-SUICIDE and talk to someone whose only concern is you. Just remember, depression doesn’t go away on it’s own. It needs intervention.

            Depression is the leading cause of disability among adults in the U.S.A. and world wide. The best thing you can do for yourself is know the symptoms of depression. If left untreated, it can last for years, leaving you at risk of suicide or worse. Following, is a short list of symptoms. If you experience four of these symptoms for two weeks or longer, you might be depressed.

• Incessant negative thoughts
• Sadness or unexplained crying
• Hopelessness
• Lack of pleasure in life
• Need for isolation
• Thoughts of suicide
• Loss of appetite or overeating

(c) M.D. Johnson (2013)

I don't know about "forgiveness," only "acceptance."

I don’t know about forgiveness, only acceptance. When I accept what happened, I can choose to confront the perpetrator or not. I can request accountability or not, and I can also accept a surprising response.  If someone offends us or a loved one, it is their choice to take responsibility, but whether they take responsibility or not, we can hold them accountable. Once blame is established, we can accept what happened and move on--with or without their blessing. We don’t have to forgive because who knows what it means, anyway?

Forgiveness is a concept that is difficult to ascertain, impossible to explain, so why do we use such a complex word to describe something as simple as, “acceptance”? I don’t understand forgiveness and I don’t care to because I know that people will pay, and they should pay for their wrongful acts.” No amount of ill will or animosity will can take the place of karma, which is the ultimate equalizer. In life, we get what we pay for whether we like it or not. Karma makes sure of that.

The “Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines “forgiveness” as: a : “to give up resentment of or claim to requital for <forgive an insult>. b : to grant relief from payment of <forgive a debt>. 2. : to cease to feel resentment against ...” We are only humans dealing with humanity. Analyzing these definitions, it makes sense "to give up resentment” because s/he who angers us, creates resentment within us, creates negative emotions, and maintains control over us. “To grant relief from payment of” or to “forgive a debt,” is meaningless because karma takes care of all debts, and it is impossible to pray our debts away. Karma functions like a boomerang, and whatever we dole out comes back to us with interest and with full force of a hurricane or tornado, so when someone seems to escape punishment, we can release all negative energy because they cannot escape their karma. Like a pebble in the water, there are ripples that eventually return to their source.

“Karma” is the universal law of cause and effect and once we accept that the universe is in control of checks and balances, we can live free. Forgiveness is unnecessary, but acceptance is something that we all can do. We don’t have to forgive wrongs or grant relief from payment, but we do have to release feelings of resentment  and victimization and allow our Higher Power to manage the rest. Resentment diminishes our power, destroys our self-esteem, creates feelings of victimization, and allows someone other than ourselves to take control of our lives. Knowing this, forgiveness still does not come easy. Acceptance, rather than forgiveness, makes a lot of sense to me.